Originally I wrote this blog in March of 2013. It was titled ‘Accomplishment-fed Rest’ and written in the thick of a season I felt I had to earn everything. [Find the original post below]
In that time I had two God dreams.
In one I was standing waist-deep in the ocean and kept dropping my license (a symbol of identity) in the water like it was expendable–it would float out with a waves and by grace alone come back to me.
In the second dream I was exhausted from over-activity and kept replacing batteries in my side every few hours. Holy Spirit revealed a three-pronged plug at the bottom of one of my feet–I knew the exhaustion could end and I could be plugged into His power endlessly.
Oh these images still ring true. It’s so easy to drop my identity into the motion and waves of the day, be defined by circumstances, and get my worth from the latest opinion rolling by. It’s so easy to keep filling myself back up with batteries when I’m empty.
I’m reminded of a better way than batteries and waves. A way to plug into eternal love forever. The hand of the Father extended toward me, asking me to hold my identity securely forever
I hope you can hear Him calling you,
“Come, all you who are thirsty,
come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.
Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and you will delight in the richest of fare.
Give ear and come to me;
listen, that you may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
my faithful love promised to David.”
ENJOY THE ORIGINAL POST:
A million rambling thoughts and a body set on just getting things done, that when the phone rings, Loved One, I half-hover over ignore, before a tired,
‘the middle of something,’
get back to the sluggery of cubicle-work, vacuum-push, this month’s budget. Use a second Pinterest tab for that ‘there’s still bright in life’ relief.
We can become, so internalized. Because it’s easier than living deep, present, aware, engaged, whole.
When my day is check-listed and all to-dos, what life is there left in me but “I got a lot done today” (practically dead) sleep?
A soul-whisper is rolling through me
It’s not about how much you get done—
that will not be etched on your gravestone.
Destiny isn’t what you accomplish
But who you are. And who you love.
It’s scary, this slowing. This unbearable lightness of just—being. The slow soul that sees dappled light, green leaves; the rib cage that opens enough to listen; the relationships piped with fresh new water when you do; and all the hope that floods with slow-beauty. It all piles up on that shambled roof called fear of disappointment, almost making it crumble. Under the weight, fear whimpers, ‘you’ll be let down, keep your head down, close your eyes, run.’
Too heavy, this glory. So we hide, again.
Get out the magazine, distract. Hang by a thread, all ready to complete more things when
Some sunset, some God-vision, some line in a book, some song, some dream, pull you… Wake. Up.
“Then you will look and be radiant,
your heart will throb and swell with joy;
the wealth on the seas will be brought to you,
to you the riches of the nations will come.”
He is doing something majestic in the earth and I want to see it, to really see it. Not just do it, like I have to make a grade, but drink in His glory with my soul and breathe awe at this human life.
Is not the laughing farmer’s wife with muddied, glee-eyed kids greater in destiny than the full-pursed, Armani suit, with cinder eyes? Or even the serious, downtrodden missionary with no joy left for those she would save?
It’s easier to hide in busy tired ragged. I get it. But, what about that blue bird still singing in your ribcage for life, fullness, wonder? Maybe she knows more than this voice saying, more, more, more growing louder everyday. The birdsong is quieting. The soul is begging.
What are the ways you hide? Can you name them?
Come back to the world with your beautiful voice, and let us hear you sing.
“Arise, shine, for your light has come,
and the glory of the Lord rises upon you.
See, darkness covers the earth
and thick darkness is over the peoples,
but the Lord rises upon you
and his glory appears over you.
Nations will come to your light,
and kings to the brightness of your dawn.
“Lift up your eyes and look about you:
All assemble and come to you”